Menopause is wild. Some days I feel okayish while other days I want to scream, cry, or nap in the fridge. Hormones go rogue, sleep disappears, and my patience? Yeah, she left the group chat a while ago.

I stopped HRT this week, not because it wasn’t helping, but because the break from progesterone every month totally wrecked me. My body crashed, my mood tanked, and life just sort of unraveled during that gap. Add in the fact that I’ve just kicked off a new cluster headache cycle and, well… the chaos is real.

So right now, I’m leaning on essential oils. Nothing fancy. Just a few that help me feel a bit more human on the emotional rollercoaster that is hormone transition.

This isn’t a magic fix. It’s not a “do this and you’ll be zen forever” kind of thing. (I bloody well wish it was and welcome ANY tips or tricks you’ve got!) It’s just what’s working for me right now – small, doable steps that offer comfort when everything feels horribly chaotic instead of beautifully chaotic.

Morning: Hormone + Mood Support

Hormone & Mood Balancing Roll-On
– 3 drops Clary Sage
– 3 drops Geranium
– 2 drops Ylang Ylang
– 2 drops Frankincense
→ Top with carrier oil in 10ml roller. Apply to wrists, temples, over heart.

Uplifting Diffuser Blend
– 3 drops Bergamot
– 3 drops Sweet Orange
– 2 drops Frankincense
→ Diffuse 15–20 mins while starting your day.

EndoFlex Application
→ Apply EndoFlex (direct or diluted) to thyroid, lower back (adrenals), or feet.

Optional: Estrogen-Supportive Roll-On
– 3 drops Clary Sage
– 3 drops Geranium
– 2 drops Ylang Ylang
– 2 drops Fennel
→ Top with carrier oil in 10ml roller. Apply to wrists, inner ankles, or lower belly. Great if I’m emotionally all over the place. And hey — if you’re rolling oils, you can’t punch anyone. Win-win.

Afternoon: Re-Center + Reset

Adrenal Support Roll-On
– 2 drops Rosemary
– 2 drops Cedarwood
– 2 drops Frankincense
→ Top with carrier oil in 10ml roller. Apply to lower back + back of neck. It’s like pressing the reset button mid-chaos.

Evening: Calm, Restore, Sleep

Progessence Plus
→ 1–2 drops on wrists or lower belly before bed. Supports natural progesterone and helps me settle.

Nighttime Diffuser Blend
– 3 drops Lavender
– 2 drops Roman Chamomile
– 2 drops Sandalwood
→ Diffuse 30 minutes before sleep (or while pretending not to scroll TikTok).

Self-Care Bath Blend
– 4 drops Geranium
– 3 drops Frankincense
– 2 drops Bergamot
→ Mix into 1 tbsp Epsom salts and add to a warm bath. Soak for 15–20 minutes.

Final Thoughts

You don’t have to use every oil every day. Some days I just go with EndoFlex and Progessence Plus. Other days, I go full potion master. There’s no “right” way — only what feels kind to your nervous system. Don’t turn self-care into another chore.

And if you’re going through this too then please know……

You’re not overreacting.
You’re not crazy.
You’re adjusting.
You’re doing your best — even if that just means brushing your hair (if you’ve got some) and making it to bedtime.

PSA: Avoid Pam this week. She’s off the HRT, on the oils, and one hormone away from telling everyone to fuck off.

Living with multiple chronic conditions

Chiari, EDS, adrenal insufficiency, endometriosis, cluster headaches, and peri menopause to name a few can often feel like navigating an unpredictable maze .

The unpredictability of symptoms, the mental and emotional weight of managing them, and the constant need to be aware of what’s happening in my body is exhausting .

I don’t always talk about the hard days, the days when I feel like I’m fighting against my own body , but they exist, much more than I care to admit at the moment, if I’m honest . Im entering a new cluster cycle.

The chaos in my body doesn’t always look the same from day to day, and there are times when it feels like I’m doing everything right and still being knocked down .

I’ve learned that it’s okay to not have it all figured out, to rest , and to ask for help . Strength doesn’t always look like powering through ; sometimes it’s about accepting what’s happening, allowing yourself space to breathe, and taking care of your mind and body in whatever way you can.

Living with these conditions doesn’t define me, but it does shape how I navigate the world .

I’m still learning to live with the chaos and the unpredictability a decade on, finding my new normal as things change , and finding peace in the moments of stillness .

Right now, I’m also coming into a cluster headache cycle, which brings a lot of fear . The pain itself is intense, yes… but it’s the fear of the unknown that makes it worse . The fear of when the pain will peak, how long it will last , and how much more I can endure. It’s mentally draining in a way that’s hard to explain. Every time it begins, I have to remind myself to breathe and take it moment by moment. That’s all I can do in any moment.

But that’s the reality of chronic illness – it’s unpredictable, it’s messy, and it’s hard. And yet, we keep going.

I’ll post about cluster headaches (aka suicide headaches) soon.

I was diagnosed with Chiari malformation in November 2013, and life hasn’t been the same since.

In January 2014, I had decompression surgery. Not because I had time or options, but because a kink in my brainstem left no choice. That surgery saved my life… but recovery?…..that was a whole other story.

Post-op complications hit fast and hard. Recovery was anything but straightforward, and eventually I needed a VP shunt to manage pressure and cerebrospinal fluid issues. This brought a whole new level of hospital stays, uncertainty, and trying to explain it all to people who had never heard of any of it… myself included.

Since then, life’s been a mix of ups, downs, and times when I’ve genuinely thought (or wished) my head would just fall off. Lately, a lot of my old symptoms have returned… the headaches, dizziness, nerve pain, balance issues, and that bone-deep fatigue only someone with Chiari (or a shunt) truly understands.

So it’s been back into the soul-destroying system that is the NHS. Trying to get proper help through the NHS has been one of the hardest parts. I’m grateful for the care that does exist, but when your symptoms are flaring and appointments are months away, it’s hard not to feel completely lost in the system.

Even the small everyday decisions — like what to do with your hair — become major ones. For me, I have to keep my hair short, not because I want to, but because when it grows the nerve pain is unbearable. Something as personal and expressive as your hair becomes just another thing you have to manage around the pain.

And although it’s only hair, I really struggled (and still do from time to time!) with the fact that the decision is made for me because of pain. As someone who used to wear beehives, updos, plaits, and everything in between… a shaved head took a little getting used to — and that’s without the judgment and questions from others about why I shave my head!

What I’ve Learned Through It All

Surgery isn’t the finish line — in fact, it’s just the beginning.
It’s easy to think brain surgery will fix everything. But for me, it was just the start of a much longer, lifelong journey.

Living with a shunt is like having a second full-time job.
There’s always that quiet worry and the niggling questions…
Is this pain normal? Is something wrong? Should I go in or just wait it out again? Has my shunt blocked? 

You constantly have to adapt. Find your new limits. Create new routines. And do whatever makes life that little bit more bearable.

Rest more. Ask for help (still working on that one). Accept some things as the new normal.
And shift every time your health shifts.

There are days I’m angry. Days I’m scared. Days I ask why me…And days I just feel completely over it all.

To Anyone Else Living with Chiari, a Shunt, Both… or Any Other Chronic Illness

I see you.
You’re doing something incredibly hard, even when it doesn’t look like it.
You’re still here, still trying, still carrying a weight that no one else can fully understand — and living life!

If you’re stuck waiting for care, trying to be heard, or just getting through the day one hour at a time… just know you’re not alone.

Chiari is only part of my story. I also live with cluster headaches, endometriosis, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS), and adrenal insufficiency. Each condition brings its own challenges, and often overlaps into each other. I’ll be sharing more about them in future posts.